


The Masks We Wear

by Comicfan



Category: Red Hood and the Outlaws (Comics)
Genre: Angst and Feels, F/M, Grief/Mourning, Mutual Pining
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-02-13
Updated: 2020-02-13
Packaged: 2021-02-27 19:42:06
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,819
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22701166
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Comicfan/pseuds/Comicfan
Summary: Artemis isn't thrilled with Jason's family, especially since he's returning to Gotham. It's hard to let him face them alone.Set before Batman: Alfred Pennyworth R.I.P.
Relationships: Artemis of Bana-Mighdall/Jason Todd, Bat Family & Jason Todd
Comments: 26
Kudos: 121





	The Masks We Wear

“You shouldn’t be going.”

Just the idea of Jason returning to Gotham unsettled Artemis, having him confront the rest of his so-called family was deeply disturbing.

“I have to, Alfred deserved to be honored and if he wanted the family together for this, I can’t say no.” He placed the suit he had selected out on the bed next to the duffle bag he had already packed in case the trip lasted longer than he expected. The very sight of it made Artemis grimace, it spoke of his training for the worse. In Gotham the worst usually came whether you were prepared or not.

Death had already taken away a dear friend of Jason’s now it had taken a man he considered a grandfather. She knew he felt guilt for not being there, it was the same burden he felt over Roy’s death. Artemis had tried to support him through this difficult time, but she knew her words would be forgotten the moment they blamed him. From what she knew of the bat clan they had been less than understanding with Jason and when it was convenient, they used him as a fall guy. The great detectives were completely clueless when it came to him.

Where had his family been when Jason had lost his team? Where were their righteous words when lines had been crossed by their father figure? Had any of his “siblings” offered their help to Jason?

“I should go with you then.”

Jason’s head snapped up to where she stood, at a respectful distance in his doorway. There was an unspoken but obvious tension between them since they had agreed to remain friends. While he never challenged her on her lie--their lie--it was apparent that they weren’t fooling anyone. Not even themselves. Entering his room was too personal to her, yes, sometimes friends were permitted without it being weird. Her hesitation to pass the threshold was an admission, it was a sign that she felt crossing into his space meant something deeper.

“Someone needs to watch the kids, Red. Sure, B and Faye can handle some of it, but they are a handful.” Jason sounded cheerful but they both knew it was just an attempt to sound more upbeat than he felt. He turned away to focus on his packing before adding, “And I’m pretty sure having company would be taken the wrong way.”

“The mighty Batman and his ilk would feel threatened?” Artemis mocked. Everyone knew how obsessed that man was with his damn city to the point he’d deny all assistance from outsiders like her. It didn’t matter if it wasn’t the whole team just a single teammate would set off the vigilantes.

“…That’s not what I meant.” When she didn’t respond he met her gaze again. “Usually these types of things are family only, even in our most dysfunctional state. Having anyone accompany us…as a plus one…kind of sends a particular message about us.”

 _Oh_.

Artemis looked away first as his meaning became clear. Of course, she hadn’t considered that arriving with Jason would hold a deeper meaning. They were all trained to make deductions based on behavior and Jason always went to family meetings alone. Having someone with him, a woman no less, would speak of their bond. It would mean Jason had the support of a lover. For a moment Artemis finds herself considering taking such a path.

Would the mighty Batman and the rest disapprove? There were rumors that Batman didn’t like his sons dating metas, aliens or any woman seen as superhuman. Amazons surely fell into that category. Would that make the situation harder for Jason? Would they focus more on her than their grief? Would their disapproval make them more aggressive?

If she’s being generous (which she’s not feeling particularly inclined to be with this family) Artemis can see them trying to ignore her presence. Letting Jason know that it was a private party and not wanting to speak with her in the room. The vicious part of Artemis can imagine it escalating into a bar fight and the thought of thrashing them the moment they gang up on Jason is extremely gratifying. It’s not however, suitable for a wake honoring someone like Alfred Pennyworth. In fact, it’s the opposite of what he wanted.

“I see.”

Letting Jason go alone to see those people is an unbearable thought. They both know that even in the best case scenario he will be blamed for _something_. He was already asked not to be present when he was informed about his surrogate grandfather’s death despite the man’s last wish. They insult Jason at every turn and it always falls to him to be the bigger man. He does it because he’s tired of the fighting and doesn’t feel like he deserves to complain as much because of his past.

_Sound familiar, Artemis?_

“I’ll try to make it a short trip, but you know Gotham. It always throws a curve at you and all you can do is roll with the punches.” The bag Jason carefully hangs his suit in brings out the smallest of smiles from him. It was a gift from Alfred he had said, because no matter what the circumstances one should always look their best when wearing a suit. 'Upbringing means nothing when you present yourself as an equal' the old man had said. It had helped Jason feel a little less nervous when he dressed up among a group of people he knew were going to look down on him.

“Good. Leave them to sort out the messes they create.” Her tone made it clear how little she cared about their struggles before her voice softened and she added: “We can talk about it when you get back.”

“Not that I don’t appreciate it, but you don’t need to look after me. I’ve been taking care of myself for a long time.”

“That explains so much, someone has to teach you how to do it right.” The tease made the corners of his lips curve into a grin and Artemis felt her heart thud at the sight.

_You have no right to feel this way. Doesn’t Jason have enough pain in his life already?_

Jason’s smile faded as flickers of emotion he tried so hard to control started to slip out. In an instant Artemis is by his side again, encircling him in her arms as his grief rises to the surface. “Tell me.”

“I just…how many times do I have to go through this? I keep losing everyone and most of them come back anyway. It feels like it’s all for nothing. I know he’s gone but part of me keeps thinking Alfred, and even Roy, will return. I can’t—I don’t want to keep doing this.”

“Just know that you’re not alone in this, Jason. We’ll be here when you return. Even if the students set the house on fire once more.”

“Even that’s hard to accept, Red. I keep thinking I’m going to wake up someday and this will all be gone.” The tears don’t fall but his beautiful eyes have a sheen to them.

Artemis feels a swell of guilt for leaving him behind, at the time it’s seems like the only option to keep him safe. It would have been better for all of them if Jason had been with them, even on the horrible world Bizarro and her were trapped on. At least they would have been together, he wouldn’t have had to endure those lonely days when he was left to his own devices.

As much as she wants to promise nothing will ever change, they both know that’s a futile hope at best.

“Then all we can do is do our best to keep everything together.”

Against common sense her hands have gained a will of their own and frame his face. It’s an intimate gesture, the sort that isn’t shared between two friends. The longing in his eyes is just as apparent as it’s always been but he doesn’t call her out on her fib. Not yet anyway, and for that Artemis is grateful, because explaining herself will be the hardest thing she’s ever done. She’s not even certain such a thing is possible, not without losing everything.

“Are you ready?”

Her question holds more meaning than she intended. Jason studies her for a moment considering his response before offering a sad smile.

“Not really.” His eyes briefly dip to her lips before he cleared his throat. “It’s always easier when we meet in uniform. The masks help everyone hide what their feeling, or at least makes it more manageable.”

“Then maybe you need to wear a mask.”

The expression he gives her almost makes Artemis laugh, instead she releases her hold on him to reach for an item off to the side. It’s not much of a substitute for an actual mask but it will have to do.

“You think sunglasses will work?” The disbelief in his voice does make her grin despite her attempts to remain serious.

“They more or less worked for Superman for a long period of time, didn’t they?”

“I guess they did.” Jason put the sunglasses on and raised an expectant eyebrow. “What do you think?”

It didn’t hide the emotion in his gaze it just made it harder to see. For anyone that didn’t know him or didn’t look beyond the surface it was the perfect cover. Artemis didn’t know any of his “family” well enough to judge what category they fell in.

“They should do, although it might not matter once the arguments start.” Artemis frowned at the memory of Jason telling her why a group of heroes were hunting him down. Just because his brat of a little brother felt compelled to place blame on Jason (for the second time) and everyone just believed him without proof. “Don’t let them hold you accountable for things you didn’t do.”

“I wasn’t preparing to, Artemis. Believe me, I’m more than tired of being their whipping boy.” Hearing the conviction in his tone made some of the tension leave her shoulders.

“Good, and if it looks like their going to take things too far-- _ **again**_ \--get out of there. You’re there for Alfred, not them. I will have my phone on me in case they decide to be irrational.” She retreated to the doorway, back to an acceptable distance. “I’ll leave you to finish up your packing.”

“Thanks. I’ll call you when I get there and let you know the details after. Let me know if anything happens while I'm away."

"I will."

Their discussion felt far too much like a couple, making promises of contact and planning out how they would proceed. Something in Artemis’ chest lurched at the thought and she took one last look at him before she forced herself to walk away.


End file.
